I still remember watching Romeo and Juliet – the re-make with Leo Di Caprio and Kirsten Dunst, for the first time. I was about 10 years old, laying down on the soft carpet in our living room and thinking “God, this is the kind of man I want.” Maybe I wasn’t thinking exactly that at such a young age, but it was something similar and it grew particularly strong at the scene where Leo was walking on the beach in a suit with a loose tie, hair all over the place and squinting. This scene touched something very deep inside me and stamped my heart for life – from then on, I was going to look for this man.
No, not Leo in particular, but this man in a suit, blondish hair, boyish charm, looking like his thoughts are far away, away from this world… until he falls in love. The romantic man, who would do anything to win your heart. In short, then and there, without me realizing it, the looking for mr right began.
Looking for Mr Right: Mission Accomplished
Fast forwarding to a proper age, it’s safe to say I liked many different guys over the years and mostly things just didn’t work out. That’s the short version of the story and the long version requires too much wine to be told. At first, I struggled getting guys to like me. Then, I struggled really liking guys. But at my 24th birthday God sent me a sign that all was about to fall in place.
Little pre-history: a few months before my 24th birthday I started a new job and at the Christmas party of the company I saw HIM. Suit. Crazy blondish hair. Boyish charm. Deep blue eyes that looked like his thoughts were far, far away and as I found out later, really romantic… My heart skipped a beat, but nothing else happened.
Back to my birthday party: one of the new colleagues I invited called me an hour before the start of the party and says “Hey, a boy you probably don’t know is here with me, he is not from here and doesn’t have any plans for tonight, do you mind if he comes to your birthday party.” I didn’t mind. I instantly knew who that boy was. And this time, something happened.
The Precipice Between Mr. Right and Mr. Happily Ever After
When and how our rather short, quite unsuccessful, “dont-even-know-can-it-be-called-relationship” relationship started and ended is again a subject of one of those lots-of-wine talks I mentioned and I won’t bore you with it here. But it did start. And it did end. And he was everything I was looking for. So it all threw me deep in misery for about… four months.
This is how long it took me to finally find the path to true love and true happiness. And the path started with this simple breakthrough:
The truth is you have no idea what kind of man will make you happy. (tweet that)
But God does. Or the universe, or whatever it is that you believe in. You don’t know. And the best thing that can EVER happen to you is to meet the man of your dreams. Because if it works – then great, you took a lucky guess. But if it doesn’t, and in most cases it doesn’t, you can finally be free and OPEN your mind for all other men out there, waiting to make you happy.
To finish my story, after this realization hit me like a ton of bricks I started dating a lot and I tried to be aware of my feelings – no lists of requirements involved. Just the answer of a simple question – how is this guy making me feel? I didn’t meet my now husband at a date though. He was a colleague. But what matters is I am not sure I would appreciate him and let him come closer to me had I not seen that what I was looking for was really a scam.
Here is what is sad. I hear from so many women with broken hearts who keep looking for that same guy, even though it didn’t work the first time… and the second/third/fourth… God always sends us the man of our dreams. It’s our responsibility to admit the mistakes of our choice if things don’t work out though. And we rarely do.
And now, I’d love to hear from you. Have you had your heart broken from the man of your dreams? Do you have any advice for women looking for love?
My name is Maya and I help women find The One. If you are searching high and low for Mr. Right, my “Find Mr. Right today” FREE 30 min coaching session will surely help you: you can book it using the Contact Form on this page.